Being in Control
To have any control of life you need to understand that there is no control in life. You don’t have control over the weather, actions of other people, animals, or really anything except your reactions to life.
Control is responding instead of reacting. Reaction is acting without thought. Responding is acting thoughtfully.
In martial arts you are taught to react out of reflex but a true master of martial arts understands that blind reaction could end up hurting or killing a person. A true master has also learned that not having a reaction to an action is a reaction.
A master’s response to an outside action is to quiet their mind and see the intention of the outside action and respond accordingly. For example, if someone comes up from behind a martial artist and brushes their shoulder, it could be a loved one brushing dirt from their shoulder or it could be a fist from a misguided youth. In that moment a master has quieted his mind, read the situation and responded appropriately, either without force or with just the right amount of force, to remedy the situation that just occurred.
To have control in your own life, do what the masters do. Quiet your mind, see the situation as it is and respond with a controlled reaction of your choosing rather than a reaction of reflex. Meditation teaches you to quiet the mind. A quiet mind is the way to master being in control of your life.