Crohn’s Colitis: Beyond the Silence


Beyond the Silence

When I write to you about meditation I write about finding the silence.  I don’t usually talk to you about what is after the silence or what to do with it. So here I am going to tell you my story of beyond the silence.

I am seeking God with my silence.  I am sorting out what I believe God is.

My father prayed for 6 hours a day. He would say the rosary and his dedication seemed to be his God.  I read a lot about yogis and they talk about their devotion to God and how they feel.  Some beat their bodies and others live their lives following a lifestyle dictated by rules passed down through the ages.  Some use breath work to get to God or what they believe is the true pathway to God. I am having a real problem with the idea that there is one path to God for everyone. I believe each person has their own path which is unique to their life and their life experience. These techniques that anyone chooses to find silence do not necessarily mean you will find God.

First you have to ask, what is God? Is it a being, a feeling, energy, what?  I have sat in deep silence and felt things beyond anything that I could describe on paper or wouldn’t even try to describe.  Where do you go in your silence?  I know my ego is the one asking questions here.  I know that the questions from ego are what  keep me from seeing my own answers.

Is the silence God?  Maybe I need to let go again so I can see my answer again.  Maybe God is hiding behind my own eyes so I cannot see him.  Maybe he has been hiding there the whole time.

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