I had a Dream
I wanted to talk to you about my post Learning Something about Myself. I wanted to update you that I am doing better. I have continued meditating and writing the post helped. I have also been talking to friends and doing my normal healing work which has helped work out my anger. But, is the problem solved about dreaming big?
There is a fear that comes with dreaming big for me. Yes, the anger is dissolving but the learning challenge is still there. Time has still passed, I am the same person minus some anger. I am still going to be forty eight. The funny part is I have no real dream anymore. For a while I wanted to make a difference by enlightening people to meditation. I have found that I can introduce them to meditation but it cannot be my dream but their dream.
With the dream of trying to help people there is a fine line between helping them and enabling them. When I was sick I needed to fight my way to where I am. I had to learn and focus and not give up. I had to help myself. I had to find my fire, which I did and that fire is now like white hot coals. But now I am wondering, where do I direct the heat from the focus I developed? Where do I dream from here?
Or, maybe it’s time I stop dreaming and understand that the next dream is not a dream at all but creating an unbreakable faith in god and/or universe.